A Guiding Hand

"We must open the doors of opportunity. But we must also equip our people to walk through those doors." – Lyndon b. Johnson

Yesterday, I attended the Los Angeles County Bar Association's Domestic Violence Project training and I was overwhelmed with the amount of people that showed up to volunteer. The statistics the program leaders supplied us with regarding the number of victims that come into their office each year was unbelievable. In Los Angeles county alone, the office helps 85,000 victims of domestic violence a year. 85,000 people mostly women but some men, are victims of violence in their home. Domestic violence is defined as a pattern of coercive and controlling behaviors and tactics used by one person over another, usually a spouse, domestic partner, or significant other, to gain power and control. How horrifying is it to think that the person you love and who supposedly "loves" you could be capable of hurting you in so many ways. These victims seek refuge at the office because they have no where else to turn and this office is their last hope to living a normal life, whatever that may mean. The home is supposed to be a person's castle, their safe haven, away from the troubles of the outside world. I cannot even imagine coming home to the terror these victims face everyday.

My personality is very harsh at times and I'll admit I can be very abrasive. I am a firm believer of speaking up for yourself and some what of a feminist. I would be the first one to say that being a woman in an male egotistic world is not an excuse for not succeeding and before attending this training I probably would have easily seen these victims in a negative light. Yesterday really opened my eyes, things aren't so black and white. Everyone has their own different situation and their own different reasons for doing what they do. Some victims, so plainly just aren't aware of their rights. They are afraid for their children, their families, their lives. Instead of judging these victims, saying "why don't you just leave" we should be saying "I'm glad you had the courage to seek help."

Out of the 85,000 victims that receive help through the Domestic Violence project, 85% of those victims report that the domestic violence has ceased. This statistic especially impacted me. The help we give to these victims are really helping. The few hours a month each volunteer devotes is potentially saving a life. There are many opportunities out there for help, but sometimes those more fortunate need to give a guiding hand to those who may not see the way.

August 2012

Agenda: SPAIN

This will be my graduation / done with the bar gift to myself :)
eeeeeeeeekkkkkkkkkk

We are Family!

All I have to say is wow my family is awesome. My cousins are crazy and I love it! Another awesome weekend has gone by with my family. My cousin from New York decided to celebrate his 30th birthday with us in California. I'm glad my family and I have gotten close these past few years. I think it's because once we grow older we realize that family will be the ones there with you at the end. At the very end family will be there for you when no one else will. I have been blessed with amazing people in my life and I could not ask for anything more. My cousins are crazy, ambitious, loud, obnoxious, funny, smart, loyal, and my world.

The venue for the celebrations this weekend were The Association on Friday and The Room on Saturday. I really enjoyed these places because 1) there were no lines and 2) the music was on point. Honestly, I don't really care for the big fancy clubs because it's not where your at it's who you're with. As long as I'm with my friends and family I know I'll have fun. Festivities continue on tonight with dinner. The entire family including the aunts and uncles will be at dinner to celebrate all the September birthdays!

Weekend Highlights:
- Cousin DJing at Association
- Creepy girl at Association
- BOMB Kbeebs when you're faded
- Creepy girl from Association was at the room the next night!!! and VJ recognized her! lol
- Dancing and singing to "NEW YORK"
- VJ's extreme V neck
- Mel's Diner
- VJ propositioned Daryl to Merv

Body Language

Feel good song of the day... :) happy Saturday!

My Future Husband

Jessie Williams you don't know it yet but we're soul mates.... ::sigh::

Our Family

I miss this...

The Journey

I found this excerpt from an article pretty enlightening...

"The point is that you are exactly where you need to be and you are there because of everything you have experienced. My friend, every moment you have experienced is a gift you have offered yourself. Regardless of whether you perceived it as a lesson or not, all experiences have made you who you are today.

One thing I can guarantee is that you are headed in the right direction, because it is literally impossible to do otherwise. Bless every moment you have and are experiencing. Bless every positive and negative experience; bless every positive and negative moment."

My Hero!

Thanks to Jacq I had a good laugh in class...

New SouL

Capricorn Women

I thought this was on point.

It is very difficult to define the characteristics profile of a Capricorn girl exactly. She can be the babe on the beach or a scientist sitting in the laboratory, doing experiments that can save mankind. Whatever she is on the outside, when you look inside you will find a girl who looks for security, authority, respect and position. It is an entirely different matter how she seeks to achieve these goals. It may be as the president of a country or as the wife of an ambitious man. She seeks recognition and it doesn't matter how she gets it.

A Capricorn female is like that goat, which has to reach the top of the mountain. It doesn't matter what position she starts and how slowly she walks, she will be at the top much before those, who were running in front of her. She will do it with such subtlety that you wouldn't even know when she crossed all the milestones. She has her aims and ambitions, but they don't come before her family. She can enjoy the role of a wife or a mother as much as that of the CEO of the biggest MNC. However, you will have to provide her with equivalent respect and security.

Almost all the Capricorn women have immaculate etiquettes. They have an inherent sense of social elegance, modesty and conventional look. Though she looks completely calm, composed and balanced, don't think she doesn't have mood swings. She can become really depressed if she thinks that someone has misjudged or ill-treated her. In such a case, she may brood for months at a time. This stems from the fact that she does not feel as secure as she seems to be and fears being ridiculed or laughed at.

It is advisable not to tease a Capricorn girl; she may take it too literally. Though she may pretend otherwise, she seeks as much compliments as the other girls, probably even more. Show her that you appreciate her and make her feel secure. It will help her in opening up and showing her deliberately controlled passion. A Capricorn girl's personality doesn't include the trait of wishful thinking. She sees only those dreams that can be converted into reality. She enters a boat only when she knows that the waters are safe.

She will emphasize heavily on social etiquettes and you never see her serving the guests in anything but crystal cutlery. There will always be something fresh about her beauty and she will never ever be unattractive, even when she is wearing those hair-curlers. A Capricorn female will appear to be extremely confident, but inside she is quite unsure about her appearance. You will have to reassurance her time and again that she is attractive. She will always be honest and will expect the same from you.

At the same time, you will have to respect her family. Remember when you marry a Capricorn woman; you marry her family and relatives too. If ever you criticize her family members, better ensure that the criticism is constructive or she will never forgive you. Her love for you will never prevent her from taking care of her family. The plus point of this attitude is that she will be equally considerate towards your family too and give them the same respect as her own fellows. She will never mind if you cancel your holiday trip to pay for dad's operation.

10 things you wish you could tell 10 different people....

Ten different things you would say to 10 different people:

1. Our family misses you, I miss you, I know you are watching me and guiding me from up there.
2. I am sorry for hurting you but I am truly happy for you and for all that you have become.
3. We were best friends, I miss you, I wish we could have fixed our friendship.
4. You were the only boyfriend who gave me butterflies, sometimes I wonder if I should not have let go of you
5. Don't ever give up. We need you in our family, your strength keeps our family alive.
6. You became everything I thought you weren't, but its okay because you only made me stronger
7. You should have more confidence in yourself, any guy would be lucky to have you. so work it!
8. I wish you would just come back into our lives, me and ash need you, it's not fair that you left us again. What did I do?
9. Congratulations on your marriage, It was a surprise but I am happy you found the one.
10. Do not be afraid of the unknown, just have faith that everything will turn out the way it's supposed to. everything happens for a reason.

The Quarter-Life Crisis

A great little article to know you are not alone. Everyone at our age is scared and confused out of their minds. Article sent to me via Cindy!

For those in their twenty-something's...This puts it all into words
perfectly. They call it the Quarter-life Crisis."

It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that
there are a lot of things about yourself that you didn't know and may or may
not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year
or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now.

You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends
that you thought you were so close to aren't exactly the greatest people you

have ever met and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most
important ones. What you do not realize is that they are realizing that too
and are not really cold or catty or mean or insincere, but that they are as
confused as you.

You look at your job. It is not even close to what you thought you would be
doing or maybe you are looking for one and realizing that you are going to
have to start at the bottom and are scared.

You miss the comforts of college, of groups, of socializing with the same
people on a constant basis. But then you realize that maybe they weren't so
great after all.

You are beginning to understand yourself and what you want and do not want.
Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find
yourself judging a bit more than usual because suddenly you realize that you
have certain boundaries in your life and add things to your list of what is
acceptable and what is not.

You are insecure and then secure. You laugh and cry with the greatest force
of your life. You feel alone and scared and confused. Suddenly change is the
enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life
but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away and
there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward.

You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such
damage to you or you lay in bed and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent
enough to get to know better.

You love someone but maybe love someone else too and cannot figure out why
you are doing this because you are not a bad person. One night stands and
random hook ups start to look cheap and getting wasted and acting like an
idiot starts to look pathetic.

You go through the same emotions and questions over and over and talk with
your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a
decision. You worry about loans and money and the future and making
a life for yourself and while winning the race would be great, right now
you'd just like to be a contender! What you may not realize is that
everyone relates to it. We are in our best of times and our worst of times,
trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out.

Another Step Up.

Last Night was Merv's graduation/being done with the GRE's celebration. We started the night off with dinner at Mi Piace in Pasadena. Their bread with oil and vinegar is the best I've tasted. After dinner we headed to NeoMeze across the street. It was a nice lounge with good music. Lacking in the dancing department but overall a good place. I want to try it for happy hour. Merv says they have good deals and hey it's just down the street from me! Good drinks and great company what more can a girl ask for. All in all a very good night. Congratulations Marvelous Merv on another step up! It's crazy how time flies by I could have sworn we just graduated from high school last year.

Going The Distance

This is a definite must see. Drew Barrymore was fantastic in this movie. A short synopsis of the film involves a woman from San Francisco who meets a man in NYC while on a summer internship and the movie follows their long distance relationship.

Drew Barrymore is faced with a hard decision to either stay in SF for a great job opportunity or to drop everything and move to NYC to be with her love. I could relate to the movie because I feel like I am in the same place as the protagonist. She was in the process of establishing herself and fulfilling her career goals. I feel like that is where I am right now in life, I am constantly making decisions to benefit my career and making sacrifices to better my future.

Chasing your dreams is really difficult. So many obstacles stand in the way of success such as hardships, love, and life in general. Sometimes we lose focus, but in the end if you really want something you have to have the passion to grab it. I am a firm believer that if you go after what you love and your goals in life, everything else will fall into place.

Make a Difference.

The Los Angeles County Bar Association is beginning their Domestic Violence Project. The Project was created to help victims of domestic violence and lead them to the road of recovery. Volunteers are needed to help interview victims and to help fill out documents for restraining orders. Volunteers do not need to be attorneys or law students. LACBA is just asking for those who want to make a difference is someone's life by dedicating a few hours a month to this project. If you would like to volunteer please register or get in contact with me.

Domestic violence is a serious problem in our society today and this program is a way we can ensure that something is being done to minimize the problem. Although, we may never rid the world of this horrific and degrading from of abuse, at least we know we are trying and voicing our opinion. If I know I at least helped one person in the process feel safe again, then my job is complete. Helping people live life the way they should, free from violence and the fear of being hit or abused when they get home, those are the things I want to fight for each day.




Prevalence of Domestic Violence

• In a 1995-1996 study conducted in the 50 States and the District of Columbia, nearly 25% of women and 7.6% of men were raped and/or physically assaulted by a current or former spouse, cohabiting partner, or dating partner/acquaintance at some time in their lifetime (based on survey of 16,000 participants, equally male and female).
  

  Patricia Tjaden & Nancy Thoennes, U.S. Dep't of Just., NCJ 181867, Extent, Nature, and Consequences of Intimate Partner Violence, at iii (2000), available at http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/nij/pubs-sum/181867.htm

• Approximately 1.3 million women and 835,000 men are physically assaulted by an intimate partner annually in the United States.
  

  Patricia Tjaden & Nancy Thoennes, U.S. Dep't of Just., NCJ 183781, Full Report of the Prevalence, Incidence, and Consequences of Intimate Partner Violence Against Women: Findings from the National Violence Against Women Survey, at iv (2000), available at http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/nij/pubs-sum/183781.htm

• Intimate partner violence made up 20% of all nonfatal violent crime experienced by women in 2001.
  

  Callie Marie Rennison, U.S. Dep't of Just., NCJ 197838, Bureau of Justice Statistics Crime Data Brief: Intimate Partner Violence, 1993-2001, at 1 (2003), available at http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/bjs/pub/pdf/ipv01.pdf

• Intimate partners committed 3% of the nonfatal violence against men.
  

  Callie Marie Rennison, U.S. Dep't of Just., NCJ 197838, Bureau of Justice Statistics Crime Data Brief: Intimate Partner Violence, 1993-2001, at 1 (2003), available at http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/bjs/pub/pdf/ipv01.pdf

• In 2000, 1,247 women and 440 men were killed by an intimate partner. In recent years, an intimate partner killed approximately 33% of female murder victims and 4% of male murder victims.
  

  Callie Marie Rennison, U.S. Dep't of Just., NCJ 197838, Bureau of Justice Statistics Crime Data Brief: Intimate Partner Violence, 1993-2001, at 1 (2003), available at http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/bjs/pub/pdf/ipv01.pdf

• Access to firearms yields a more than five-fold increase in risk of intimate partner homicide when considering other factors of abuse, according to a recent study, suggesting that abusers who possess guns tend to inflict the most severe abuse on their partners.
  

  Jacquelyn C. Campbell et al., Risk Factors For Femicide in Abusive Relationships: Results From A Multi-Site Case Control Study, 93 Am. J. of Public Health 1089, 1092 (2003), abstract available at http://www.ajph.org/cgi/content/abstract/93/7/1089

• Of females killed with a firearm, almost two-thirds were killed by their intimate partners. The number of females shot and killed by their husband or intimate partner was more than three times higher than the total number murdered by male strangers using all weapons combined in single victim/single offender incidents in 2002.
  

  The Violence Pol'y Ctr., When Men Murder Women: An Analysis of 2002 Homicide Data: Females Murdered by Males in Single Victim/Single Offender Incidents, at 7 (2004), available at http://www.vpc.org/studies/wmmw2004.pdf

According to the U.S. Department of Justice, between 1998 and 2002:

• Of the almost 3.5 million violent crimes committed against family members, 49% of these were crimes against spouses.
• 84% of spouse abuse victims were females, and 86% of victims of dating partner abuse at were female.
• Males were 83% of spouse murderers and 75% of dating partner murderers
• 50% of offenders in state prison for spousal abuse had killed their victims. Wives were more likely than husbands to be killed by their spouses: wives were about half of all spouses in the population in 2002, but 81% of all persons killed by their spouse.

  Matthew R. Durose et al., U.S. Dep't of Just., NCJ 207846, Bureau of Justice Statistics, Family Violence Statistics: Including Statistics on Strangers and Acquaintances, at 31-32 (2005), available at http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/bjs/pub/pdf/fvs.pdf

Barrel of Laughs

Last night I was introduced to The Ice House in Old Town Pasadena. The featured comedian was Gerry Bednob, who is best known for his parts in "The 40 Year Old Virgin" and "Zack and Mira make a Porno." The show was HILARIOUS! I haven not been to a comedy show in so long and I forgot how fun they are. I'm glad I got introduced to this place especially since its only down the street from me. If anyone out there wants a good laugh and some drinks to go with it (2 drink minimum) I definitely recommend this place.

I'm starting to really like living in LA/Pasadena area. I'm getting used to everything from the good and the bad. It's fun learning all of the hole in the wall places I've never heard of before. I'm experiencing a new city and I love it. I feel so independent and although, I am not sure what the future holds for me in this new place, all I can do is be open minded and optimistic.

New York New York!

My trip to New York was, to say the least, exactly what I needed. The trip was full of surprises from beginning to end.

As I headed to the airport, I had no expectations of what the trip would be. I just wanted to get away and clear my head. Traveling has always helped me forget. I arrived at LAX and boarded my flight and to my surprise who was there sitting in first class, Dakota Fanning! This is actually my second run in with her. I saw her once before, at a dentist appointment with Merv. I am convinced she is stalking me, or at the very least, we are destined to be best friends. Just Kidding. After my whole star struck moment, I sat in my seat and had an unexpectedly enlightening conversation with Sean, the man in the orange scarf. Sean was a traveler, a author, a lost soul. He told me all about his travels all over the world. He literally lived the life I've always wanted to live. He studied in France, England, and Italy. He has traveled to India, Scotland, and a various other destinations as well. He was also telling me about a book he was writing and it really struck a nerve in me. He said that he was writing a book on how people want to change and talk about changing but in actuality saying and doing are two very distinct things. One of the quotes from his soon to be book was, "our lives are mirrors of our values." I took this to mean that the way we live, our everyday choices shape our very morals and not the other way around. Sean was an interesting character but he definitely gave my New York trip the right feel from the very start. I was looking for change and here this complete stranger was explaining change to me, as if he were writing a book about my life. Coincidental? I think not.

Landing! New York here I am! The first night was very mellow. My cousin and I went to this place called The Coffee Shop in the city. Don't let the name fool you, It was a bar/restaurant/lounge. After a few drinks my cousin and I reminisced on old times and about our family. We talked about how we missed my brother and how he has been watching us these years. We talked about how strong our grandma is and how we cannot believe what a fighter she has become. Finally we talk about how close our family has become. Overall it was a really sappy but extremely beautiful conversation. Jill and her cousins met us up and the bar drank the night away with a few more drinks!
Friday in the city was fantastic. Jill, her cousin, and me walked around Times Square and met my cousin for lunch. We had the infamous SHAKE SHACK! My cousin recommended the stack shack sandwich. It was an orgasm in my mouth pretty much. We also each had a strawberry shake because c'mon you have to get a shake at the Shake Shake! After lunch, we toured the MTV studios where my cousin works. I am so proud of him. He has come so far and he has pushed so hard to succeed and follow his dreams. Next stop, Bryant Park. I wish we had parks like this in California. I could definitely see myself sitting in the park and doing homework. It was so relaxing. Jill got the song "this is my fantasy, this is my reality" song going from here on out. I still wonder if she's on U-Tube.

To our luck it was FASHION's NIGHT OUT that Friday night. The city was so alive with fashion. Everyone was dressed like a celebrity. There were mobs everywhere and everyone was crazy with excitement. I'm pretty sure Kanye West or Pharrel ran past me on the street. We ended the night with some crazy bar/ club dancing. I haven't danced like that in a long time. It felt so good just to let go. I would write more on this night but after 3 long islands, the nights a little fuzzy on my end.

9/11 - May the brave souls who lost their lives on this day be remembered always.
We left the city on Saturday and headed towards Delaware to visit my aunt and uncle. This was a very LONG day. It was nice seeing my aunt again, I never get to see her because she lives so far. We seized the day and stocked up on some Philly Cheesesteaks to bring back to the CIty. Once we got back to the city, we got dressed and went out into town. We apparently stepped into VEGAS. This place was awesome. Once again I can't say much about it because the Long Islands got the best of me once again. Only bad part about my trip was that I lost my phone in a cab!!! oh well at least it wasn't my camera. I think I would have been devastated if it were my camera. I knocked out at 5 and didn't wake up until 11:30 the next morning.

The last day. Sunday was supposed to be my "study in central park" day BUT it rained. So instead we all headed to town and had dinner at Serendipity. I loved the little restaurant. The dictionary defines it as "Serendipity is the effect by which one accidentally stumbles upon something fortunate, especially while looking for something entirely unrelated." This is such a great word. I love when the unexpected happens and it ends up being the most fortunate unexpected blessing. It's funny how life is full of these Serendipity moments but we are just to blind to see them. This trip was definitely Serendipity in my books. Something fortunate came out of the unfortunate. Things really do happen for a reason.

The Big Apple in the AM

Time for an adventure....


See how big the world is. Appreciate it. Live it. Love it.
It's time for me to take my own advice.
Trip musts: Times square, partying, shake shack, NY food carts, visit Mama Loi, central park studying <3
Be back on Monday folks!

Inspiration

For the past couple of weeks I've been lacking motivation and inspiration to do any kind of work. During my first year of law school I worked my butt off to be at the top and managed to transfer this year to a better law school. I think all the changes in my life have been pushing me down and I just cannot let that happen anymore.

I am slowly but surely getting my old self back. Socially, I have been able to hang out with friends and make new friends along the way at my new school. I am no longer at the point where I feel like crying because I am so lost in change. My family life is also back to normal, I am talking a lot more with my parents and I feel like we have gotten even closer after I shared what was going on in my personal life with them. My parents give the best advice about life. They have been through so much in their lifetime, and sometimes as kids, we don't realize how wise our parents are.

I asked my mom 2 weeks ago, "How do I just get over it?" and she said, "you just do it." She explained that you just get over it because it is what you have to do. My mom told me she sees a lot of herself in me and she sees the same mistakes she used to make. She gave me an interesting perspective on things. My mom explained to me that shes noticed in my life that things always seem to fall into place. I have so many blessings that come my way and trials that I am experiencing now are just God's way of testing me. She said that I have always been one to be at the top and life just does always work that way. I have to take these obstacles and treat them just as that, obstacles to "get over."

No matter what bumps in the road my come in the future, now I know I will be able to handle it. For a couple of weeks I lost that focus that got me so far in life. I lost focus on what really mattered and I lost that inspiration and drive to be at the top. I cannot and will not continue down that path. I will strive harder than I ever have, I will learn from my mistakes, and I will succeed.

These are my inspirations and they will keep me focused:

- My Parents. My parents have supported me throughout my entire life. Their support and guidance will give me strength to move forward.

- My brother. My brother's memory has always made me want to be a lawyer. The violence I saw in the world, through my brother's death, made me want to fight for victims of violence and make a difference any way I could. His memory serves as a constant reminder of why I am doing the things I am doing and why I am fighting so hard in what I believe in.

- My grandma. She has inspired me in so many ways. She is the strongest woman I have ever met. After going through different stages of cancer and kemo, she never gave up. My grandma never stopped living. She fought and she is still fighting. One day I hope to be as strong as her.

- My Cousins. The love and support my cousins and sister give me push me harder each day. Their proud smiles and jokes of how I'll need to help them out when their in jail, actually push me to become that lawyer in the family.

- My friends. I have been blessed with amazing and driven friends. A lot of my friends are successful and have high goals for themselves. Nursing school, Grad Schools, CPA's, My friend's are motivated and their success only makes me want to succeed even further.


All in all,

Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired, and success achieved.

- Helen Keller

Can You Keep a Secret

Read it. Thanks to Marvelous Merv I finally read Sophie Kinsella's "Can You Keep a Secret?" I loved the book! I want Emma's love story and the butterflies she feels when she's around Harper. I laughed out loud while reading the book and I was embarrassed for Emma when her secrets were revealed! I want what she found in Harper. She was excited and nervous every time she was around him. I remember when I used to get butterflies. I want to feel that way about a guy again, someday. I want someone who will make me nervous to the point I can't stand still and I lose all train of thought. I think I've forgotten how to just be totally infatuated with a guy instead of just being "comfortable." I miss passion and excitement. Maybe one day.

PRIME

I watched this movie this weekend. Bryan Greenberg is absolutely adorable in this movie. The attraction and chemistry between him and Uma Therman gave me butterflies. The movie was good because it wasn't those happily ever after endings that everyone anticipates. The ending was more realistic. Sorry for the spoiler but it's an old movie so too bad, but they both realize that although they love each other, they are just in two different places in their lives. They have a passionate relationship but at the end, sometimes love is just not enough. Bryan's mom in the movie is played by Meryl Streep. She gives Uma advice on her relationship and says that sometimes you have to fight for your relationship and your love but sometimes it's ok to just let go and learn from it. Anyways the movie is really good and realistic. They move on from their relationship and hey turn out just fine.

I just haven't met you yet....

Because when it happens it happens, but until it does... Life goes on :)

Questions Worth Asking

My friend Shiks sent me a link entitled "25 Beautifully Illustrated Thought Provoking Questions." It was an article on how self reflection is the key to keeping our goals and dreams intact. Shiks is so awesome when it comes to putting things into perspective. She is such a strong individual and is living her life in Europe while attending med school. I am so happy for her because she is doing what she loves and seeing the world! The article helps you learn from your past as well as give you hope for the future.

Here are a few questions the article asked:

This is definitely something I do not do enough of. I rarely count my blessings and it's horrible.

I have a wonderful and supportive family. My mom and grandma have gone through so much in their lives and going to them for advice helps me to put things into perspective. I have grown so close to my cousins and I am so thankful that I have them in my life.

I have my education. I have a B.A. in Economics and I'm currently attending Loyola Law School. I kicked ass my first year at Whittier Law School and was able to transfer. I work hard for my education and it shows. I am blessed to have the drive to be where I am at now and I cannot let anything get in the way of that.
I am blessed with friends. My friends are always there when you need someone. I have a group of friends that I have met through high school and through college. My high school friends are the ones I've known the longest and have been there for me for all the dumb drama that seems to bring my life into over-drive. They are the ones I can go to and just be me. I can go to their house and watch tv, do homework, or eat! My college roommates are like family. They were my family in San Diego when I didn't know anyone. It was like fate brought us all together. They are the ones I can talk to about living life the way I am supposed to. They fill me with that hope I need to get by day to day.

I am blessed with my possessions. I rarely just celebrate all the things I have. I have a beautiful home, a working car, a great little place I rent out from my friend's sister, running hot water, and a bed to sleep in. These are things we all take for granted and we shouldn't. Not everyone in the world has these things we take for granted everyday. I should pay more attention to the little things like this than on the small insignificant worries of life.


If I don't do it now, then when will I?

There are so many things I still want to do in my life before I get tied down. I want to be selfish with me. I want to travel all over the world. I want to do internships in Washington DC. I want to have a crazy and passionate romance. I want to be a successful and Powerful attorney that can kick ass in any courtroom. I want to travel for work, meet new people, be selfish about my career. I want to live my 20's and do what I want to do, when I want to do it. I want to be independent and not rely on anyone for love, self-satisfaction, or money. I want to have fun with my friends, network, be dumb. I want to be me.

I want to be ok with just me, by myself.


I need to let go of my fears. My fears of not living up to my full potential. My fears of not finding the right one. My trust issues. I've let the experiences and tragedies in my life, effect my potential to love and be loved too much. I have to let go and let life take its course. It's definitely difficult to forget, but it's sometimes better to forget and learn. Everything in life happens for a reason and I have to learn the balance between learning from my past and letting it consume my future. One day I will master the key to that balance, but till then, every person I meet along the way will be my teachers on that very lesson.

Life's a Beach!

Venice Beach you are quite the character! Colleen and I decided to pay Venice Beach a visit yesterday, and it was interesting to say the very least. We ran into a ton rappers on the rise, dogs wearing sunglasses, oh and Spiderman. People watching is entertaining when you are watching entertaining people.

Colleen and I strolled the beach and had a long talk about life in general. We sat on the sand and talked about how we are at the prime of our lives. We are in our 20's, young, vibrant, goal oriented, and we should be living life. We talked about how the fast pace hustle and bustle of life makes you forget to actually live. We get so distracted by the small insignificant grievances that we let it consume our lives, instead of just living. I want to Live and I choose to Live.

Later in the evening, The cousins and I went to Mountain Bar. The line was ridiculously long but we managed to get our way in. The venue was nice, but the drinks could have been cheaper. The bar was fun but DANCING was more fun. Dancing with your best friends is the best way to party. I have the best family I could ever ask for. They are beautiful, supportive, and the epitome of love.

"Europe 2009"

Do you ever sit down and think about how funny time is? I remember the day I booked my European Road Trip adventure, I was so excited to travel through Europe, meet new people, and experience culture. It was the best trip I have ever been on and along the way I made friends that I will never forget.

Now it's over a year since we all returned from our adventure and we all still find ourselves reminiscing on all memories we made. Among the favorites are the unforgettable Amsterdam, Mount Pilatus, and the last night London. I remember our last night in London, the whole group went to a bar and indulged in drinking, good company, and dancing to Journey.

Last night, the Californians from the trip decided to get together for a mini reunion. It felt so good seeing everyone and talking about our Europe adventure. It made me realize how things are always changing over time. Catching up with everyone and seeing how their lives have continued after the trip made me appreciate every moment we live.

Europe was the best trip of my life, and I experienced it on my own. I was at a good place in my life when I took that trip and I want to get that back. I want to make choices for myself and be selfish with my time. Everyday we make choices and those choices determine how our future will be. Sometimes we can't control the repercussions of those choices but we can control how we handle the aftermath. I cannot be sure what tomorrow will bring, but I am sure of today, and today I am taking it one step at a time.
There is too much beauty in life to live it sitting down and here is the evidence of it: